


Bring Me to Life

by slampora



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Break Up, M/M, Middle School, saso 16, this fic is a meme
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-10
Updated: 2016-06-10
Packaged: 2018-07-14 06:39:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7157687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slampora/pseuds/slampora
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Remember when tweens Daishou and Kuroo had the pettiest, most dramatic breakup ever in the history of both of their junior high schools? </p>
<p>Fill for SASO16 Bonus Round 1!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bring Me to Life

“Kenma, will you please tell my ex-boyfriend that he is sitting in my lunch spot?” Kuroo said, crossing his arms and sneering. 

“Actually, Kozume, will you tell my ex-boyfriend that this is my lunch spot?” Daishou responded. Kenma rolled his eyes and sat down on Daishou’s right. He patted the bench next to him, and Kuroo sat plopped down hard enough to shake the whole thing and send a jolt through Kenma and Daishou. 

They were fighting over a bench outside their middle school that sat in a pretty courtyard underneath a tree. It was shady enough to keep cool, but in the sun enough to enjoy the weather when it was nice enough to eat outside. The bench was an ideal spot to eat lunch, and Kenma supposed that giving that kind of thing up would be tough. He just didn’t particularly care for having to play along with all the drama that came with Daishou and Kuroo’s relationship. 

Daishou had confessed to Kuroo a week and a half ago, which got on Kuroo’s nerves because he had been planning on confessing to Daishou. The first thing that Kuroo had told Kenma after Daishou confessed was, “That big jerk was faster than me again! I can’t believe I let him beat me,” followed by, “Also, Daishou and I are together now. It’s kind of a big deal.” 

And it was a big deal. The whole school seemed to be whispering about the two boys on the volleyball team who were together together. Since they were both pretty athletic, no one messed with them too badly, which, Kenma thought, would have been preferable to what they did get. 

Instead of bullies, Kuroo and Daishou got fans coming from the woodwork. Kenma was told by someone in his class that everyone totally “shipped” Kuroo and Daishou, and Kenma was mostly upset at himself for knowing what that even meant in the first place. Kuroo and Daishou were somehow elevated to the highest strata of popularity the minute they got together. Honestly, Kenma thought it was annoying. Everyone was talking about how cute they were together and how they wanted to have a gay friend and how Kenma was “so lucky” to get to spend time with them. Kenma never said that he spent the same amount of time with Kuroo and Daishou as he had before, and how they were actually kind of unbearable to be around. 

They were always fighting. It wasn’t like they didn’t fight all the time before they were together, because they did. But apparently, “in a relationship” fighting was a whole lot more dramatic than “just friends” fighting. Kuroo would throw himself across Kenma’s bed and whine for hours about whatever Daishou had done (before, he would only complain for 45 minutes, tops). Kenma was pretty sure that the two of them together was the worst thing that had ever happened to him. 

It was the worst thing that had ever happened to him, until they broke up. Then, the dramatics went off the deep end. Kuroo insisted that Daishou take back everything he had given to Kuroo, which amounted to a broken pen and a few erasers. Kenma pointed out that Kuroo could just throw it all in the trash, but it was important to Kuroo, so Kenma played along and handed the garbage over to Daishou. 

The worst part about the whole thing, Kenma thought as he sat between Kuroo and Daishou, was that they were still together all the time. They just weren’t together together. It would have been more bearable if Kenma wasn’t always having to keep them from biting each other’s heads off. Then again, Kuroo was Kenma’s best friend, which wasn’t nothing; if Kenma ever found himself in this kind of situation, Kuroo would surely be there to run interference. He was supportive and understanding, and Kenma liked being around him despite his theatrics. 

Kuroo was very much not looking at Daishou, who was very much not looking at Kuroo. Kenma ignored both of them and ate his lunch. Daishou pulled out his mp3 player, and began to blast music so loud it couldn’t have been good for his hearing. 

“I’m just a kid, and life is a nightmare” came pounding out of Daishou’s headphones. Kenma rolled his eyes. 

Not to be outdone, Kuroo pulled out his own mp3 player and blasted his own music. 

“Why’d you have to go and make thing so complicated…” 

Kenma was getting barraged by dumb emo music from both sides, and he had had enough. He stood up off the bench and addressed both Kuroo and Daishou for the first time that lunch period. “What the fuck are you two doing right now?” Kuroo and Daishou flinched. Right. Both of them were adamantly against swear words. 

“Okay fine, what the heck are you two doing?” That seemed to put them at ease. “You’re both being really dumb,” Kenma continued. “You don’t even speak English why are you listening to those songs so loudly?” 

Both Kuroo and Daishou looked offended. “You don’t have to speak their language to understand their pain,” they said in unison. Kenma picked up his lunch and his bag before walking away. His back was turned to them, so he missed the longing look that Daishou shared with Kuroo. 

***

The next day, Kuroo was on cloud nine. “Daishou and I are back together,” he explained to Kenma on their walk to school. Kenma supposed this would happen eventually, considering Daishou and Kuroo still spent all of their time together. And they both liked bad American music about feelings or whatever. It was fine. Everything was fine as far as Kenma was concerned. As long as they both left him the hell alone whenever they broke up, things would be fine. Maybe, Kenma hoped, they’d stay together forever and he would never have to deal with their annoying drama ever again for the rest of his life. 

Except things didn’t often work out the way Kenma hoped they would. Come lunch time, the whole school was buzzing about Kuroo and Daishou being back together. Someone in the baseball club had come up to Kenma and said, “I’m so happy that they’re back together! Aren’t you happy too, Kozume?” 

“Who are you?” Kenma responded. He returned to his gameboy that he had hidden under his desk. 

Kenma had spent his morning with the distinct feeling that something ridiculous was going to happen soon. As he walked outside with Kuroo at lunch, that feeling only grew stronger. He felt like he was playing a game, and the enemy approach music was playing even though there was no one else on screen. Kuroo said he understood the reference, but that Kenma shouldn’t worry so much. 

“Everything is fine,” Kuroo said as they approached their usual lunch spot. 

“Actually, everything isn’t fine,” Daishou said from behind them. Kuroo whipped around to face him, then grabbed Kenma by the shoulder to turn him around too. 

“What are you saying?” Kuroo gasped. A crowd was starting to form. 

Daishou reached into his pocket and pulled out a crumpled piece of paper. He unfolded it and cleared his throat. 

“Kuroo, I wrote this poem last night. It’s called ‘All the Small Things 2’ and I’m gonna read it now.” 

He took a deep breath and began to read. 

“All the small things, like your heart  
Truth cares but you don’t  
I am so tired of watching  
Waiting  
Commiserating  
For you Kuroo  
You are a bad boyfriend  
You are also bad at volleyball  
I don’t want to pretend anymore  
I can’t do this again  
Wake me up  
Wake me up inside  
Save me from this nightmare relationship  
Save me from you.”  
Some of the people who had gathered began to clap. Kenma wasn’t quite sure how he was supposed to react, but he figured that laughing would be inappropriate. 

“How could you?” Kuroo whispered. Kenma was afraid that he was going to cry. Fortunately, he didn’t start crying. Unfortunately, he was seething with rage and teen angst. 

“How can you say I’m bad at volleyball when you’re the one who always slacks off during practice!” Kuroo was yelling. 

Daishou stuck his chin out and pouted, “Maybe practice would benefit me more if you could actually learn how to block my spikes. It’s like you aren’t even trying anymore.” 

Kenma had to grab Kuroo by the waist to stop him from tackling Daishou to the ground. 

“You jerk! You’re lucky that Kenma is here to hold me back,” he called as Daishou walked away from the bench. Kenma let him go once Daishou was completely out of sight. He didn’t say anything to Kuroo as he sat down on the bench and began to eat his lunch. His mom had made apple pie the night before and he had packed a piece of it in his lunch box. 

Eventually, Kuroo sat down next to him. “So anyway, I was watching this really cool documentary on this chemist who like, totally changed forensic science,” he said, as if nothing had happened. They sat and ate together while Kuroo described the documentary he had watched the night before. It was like Daishou had never been a part of their lives at all, and Kenma was thankful that he would finally be getting some peace and quiet. 

Kenma was thankful until Kuroo’s phone buzzed with a new message. Once Kuroo flipped it open, Kenma peeked over his shoulder to see what it said. 

_**Daishou** : Plz tke me bak… i miss u so mch  
~Theeee Original VOLLEY-BALLERRRRRR XD_

Kenma watched Kuroo genuinely start to think about getting back together with Daishou. He packed his things and left Kuroo on the bench. 

He decided needed at least a week before he would entertain Kuroo and Daishou’s nonsense again.


End file.
